Today I feel compelled to write about when a good thing becomes an idol in our hearts.
Too often I see Christian women and men who are depressed, anxious, angry, lonely, etc... in the area of dating. I understand how the dating world can be hard on those still of the world, but don't forget that we as Christians have a love that surpasses anything we can find in a spouse 24/7.
I often hear how hard it is to find a good person.
Yes, as far as relationships go it even says in Proverbs 18:22
"He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD." (NIV)
Finding a spouse and having a God honoring relationship is a beautiful thing. Unfortunately many have turned marriage and relationships into what they're chasing instead of God and losing focus on the whole point!
One of the hardest things a Christian has to learn is to rely fully on God and not the illusion of our own strength, our own sufficiency. You may want to "take charge" of your dating life in order to find that illusive someone, but He has a plan so don't think for one second that you're doing this alone.
Mostly I'm writing this because it's a struggle that I've experienced. Nobody in the church wanted to discuss dating aside from to tell us not to have sex before we got married. What good does that do?
If someone had told me when I was a teenager what character traits I should be looking for in a potential spouse, if someone had told me that I didn't need to listen to what the world says about love. If someone had said "Fall in love with God, don't just fall in love with Him, fall HARD for Him and only then will you have the slightest idea of how to treat a spouse." Maybe I wouldn't have been chasing the relationship idol for about 8 years.
So what I'm going to suggest is that you fall in love with God if you aren't already.
2 Things that we often do in dating that we can do to draw closer to God:
- Read a text, love note or email over and over = Read your Bible
"Know also that wisdom is sweet to your soul; if you find it, there is a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off." -Proverbs 24:14 (NIV)
-Talk on the phone for hours =
"Pray continually" - 1 Thessalonians 5:17 (NIV)
Most importantly, don't lose focus, Matthew 6:33 says "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." (NIV)
Always,
Caitlin